羽之助の帝紀

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

I am officially fat 真に「太い」と呼んでもいい

I was going to British Museum on Monday when something interesting happened. I stopped behind a girl on her bicycle, who had stopped behind a boy on his bicycle, waiting for the light to change. And there were more people on their bicycles behind me, going to school or work or wherever.

This explains why the population of Japan is thin.

月曜日は英国博物館に途中で行っていた時面白い事が起こった。信号が変わるまで待っていた男子の後ろに待っている女子の後ろに僕が待っていた。そして僕の後ろに学校か仕事かどこかに行っている人達も行った。

これは、どうして日本人が痩せているのを説明する。

It was actually a good day at that school. We had some Halloween fun like passing out candy and me dressing up and scaring students and staff. Ahahahaha!
実はその学校で良い日だった。お菓子を出すとか僕が仮装して生徒達と職員達を恐慌してるのようなハロヰーンの楽しい事をやっていた。アハハハハ!

Here we have a slightly deranged-looking ghost. Japanese ghosts have triangles on their heads. I have heard the reason is a Buddhist principle important during funerals. White devil! ここは少し発狂している幽霊だ。日本の幽霊は頭で三角が付いている。理由は葬式で大切な仏教の原則だと聞いた。鬼佬!

This is some serious bad magic. これは重たいな悪魔だよね。
So then I had a medical exam that every public employee in Ichinoseki apparently has to take. They drew my blood, took my urine (for what? It just contains tea), tested my eyes (shameful) and worst of all checked my weight. 85kg. Yup, no doubt about it now. I have officially crossed the line to fat. I need to play more soccer ... But anyway, in these strange buses outside City Hall, they had me lie down on a bed, then attached wires to my joints and chest, and ran electricity through my body to check my heart! Yargh!
それからはなんか一関の公務員が全員取らなくちゃ健康調査だった。血を取った、尿 も取った(どうして?お茶ばかりが入っているよ)、目の調子を調べた (恥)、そして一番ひどかったは体重を調べた。85キロ。うん、もう否定できない。真に太いと呼ばれる。蹴球をもっとしないと・・・ま、とりあえずこっち の市役所の外の変なバスで心電図検査された!きゃあ!
So what do I do after my official confirmation of fatness? I go to freakin' McDonalds! God! じゃ、本当に太くなったと認めてからどうする?さっさとマックに行っちゃう!馬鹿野郎!

I saw this sign on the way to this morning's school. I mean, who in Japan even HAS a gun besides the yakuza? 今朝の学校に行く時はこの看板を見た。でも日本でやくざ以外は誰が銃を持っているの?
The school was pretty cool though. There are solar panels combined with mini wind generators around the school, and a monitor inside lets you know how much electricity is being generated at the moment, and how much has been generated for the entire day.
この新しい学校は格好いいと思うけどさ。太陽発電と風力発電機は学校の外に一杯あるし、中の画面で今幾つが発電してると今日今まで幾つが発電されたと見える。


And finally, after playing soccer tonight, I noticed this sign at the arena we play at. A little direct, yes, but at least it isn't horrible Engrish. そして最後は蹴球をやってから僕達が居た体育館でこの看板を見た。少し直接だけど素晴らしくひどい間違え英語ではないね。

11 Comments 論評:

  • I like the blog! You are so witty, Big Brother.

    By Anonymous Amy, at 10/26/2005 7:34 AM  

  • 今日は色々あった一日だったんだね。
    健康調査は大事だよ!1年に1度はするべき。尿で色んな事がわかる。血液と尿だけで病気がわかるんだよ!検査結果、健康だといいね♪マックは控えた方がいいよ!(笑)マックよりも野菜を食べなさい!(マミィみたい?)今日のブログは面白かったよ♪

    By Anonymous ayako, at 10/26/2005 11:28 AM  

  • Hey Hey I am less than 95Kg. I am not fat...
    Anyway, my advise for the day:
    NEVER buy cheap in ear headphones they suck ass..I got a pair for $66.99 I have to say the OEM pair that came with my i-Pod nano had better sound than these, They are going back I am gonna get a pair of sony in ear drivers.

    By Anonymous alex, at 10/26/2005 11:53 AM  

  • Alex, you're bigger than me and it looks good on you. I have not yet seen you with your shirt off, though ... :-p Hehe, thanks Amy. ん~、そうかな、でも検査は初めてだったからまだ変だったよ!野菜を食べたくない・・・涙 へへ、綾子はマミィになる?う~う、栄養の母!どうする?!笑

    By Blogger 羽之助, at 10/27/2005 7:00 AM  

  • You just need to buy nicer clothes to conceal everything. Which brings me to my next point..please update your wardrobe while you're in Japan...I expect a decently dressed white man to me when I arrive to Japan *yay selfish intentions*...

    By Anonymous Charlene, at 10/27/2005 5:09 PM  

  • Crazy people... :) At least your coating of body fur hides it hun. You can always use the excuse "I'm not fat, i'm just big boned"... or just give in and take joy in the extra lbs... err... kgs...
    (and for the record, yes I had to grab a calculator to convert kgs to lbs to know what you meant Alex)
    BTW The white squawky furball says "Hi" (actually 'mew' but whats the difference really)

    By Anonymous Jenna, at 10/27/2005 8:51 PM  

  • 何それ?
    ゲーナさんは馬鹿ですとチャリンさんはとても変なですね!?
    @_@;
    hehehe....

    By Anonymous Alex, at 10/28/2005 8:55 AM  

  • Alex... お前のカタカナは下手だ。

    By Anonymous Chris, at 10/28/2005 11:16 PM  

  • Oh Pat, your adventures are so awesome!

    By Anonymous Vicky, at 10/30/2005 3:35 AM  

  • クリスさん:
    下手だ????
    本当にありがとう。
    馬鹿!!!!、死ね!!!^_^

    By Anonymous alex, at 11/01/2005 4:01 AM  

  • はい、死んだ。

    By Anonymous Chris, at 11/01/2005 12:15 PM  

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